1. Lake District Holiday (part 6)


    Date: 8/15/2015, Categories: Exhibitionism, Author: nickitaylor, Rating: 4, Source: LushStories

    quietly while we waited for them to pass.” “We lay quietly? WE?” “But then,” went on Mike, “But then I started sneezing. It was the pollen or something in the bracken. There was nothing I could do about it. I just couldn’t stop.” “Apparently not,” said Jen. “His,” she lowered her voice, “Fucking incessant sneezing got the two lads wondering what the hell was going on.” “I snuck off deeper into the bracken,” went on Mike. “Hoping they’d just find me if they went looking. But…” Jen stared at him, raising her eyebrows as if daring him to explain the next bit. “But as it turned out, it was Jen they found, not me.” Lisa and I had our hands to our mouths; Saul had a wide toothy grin. “I was lying face down, trying to be invisible when they found me. And Mike? Well, by then he seemed to have his fucking sneezing under control.” He shrugged, Jen went on. “But he just stayed put and left me hanging out to dry.” “We were dry by then,” corrected Mike. Jen stared daggers at him, “Not literally, you arsehole. You left me metaphorically hanging out to dry.” “So?” said Lisa, “What happened?” “I looked up, covering my boobs as best I could, though my arse was in plain view, and I said, ‘Hello boys. I wonder if you could help.’” Saul chuckled, “I bet they were only too willing.” “Well,” said Jen, “The first one fished around in his pocket and gave me a handkerchief.” We fell about laughing at that one, and above the hubbub, Jen tried to explain, “He thought I’d been sneezing. ‘Thanks ...
    sweetie,’ I told him. ‘But with the best will in the world, there’s nowhere I can put this that will avoid a charge of indecent exposure.’” Now Saul was helpless, and even Mike was struggling not to laugh. When I glanced over at the next table, the young bloke with his pint seemed to have heard enough to be amused, and I realised that, as the story had gone on, Jen had forgotten to keep her voice down. Jen backhanded Mike in the chest and gave him another stare. “‘So you want some clothes?’ The other one asked.” “‘No shit, Sherlock.’ I said. What the fuck did they think I wanted? But they backed off. I don’t think they liked angry Jen and I really wanted something--anything--to wear. And clearly Mr fucking Sneezy here wasn’t going to be any help.” “I was still lying on the ground, with my arms folded across my boobs. I looked up at them and pushed myself up into a kneeling position--one hand covering my nethers, the other arm across my chest. Not that I had much dignity to maintain, thank you very much.” (That last barbed comment was aimed at me and I gave Jen a broad smile in return). “‘Look boys, if you have any clothes you could lend me, I’d really appreciate it. Do you have anything in those backpacks you could lend a damsel in distress?’ “Sherlock didn’t say a word. But Watson? I could see his brain working. Cheeky fucker. ‘Well,’ he said, ‘I have some waterproofs. But I couldn’t just give them to you. They were really expensive.’ “I held out my arms and said, ‘Well I don’t have ...
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