1. Pirate Erotica Chapter 3


    Date: 9/8/2015, Categories: Gay Male, Sex Humor, Shemales, Author: buggiebug10, Rating: 100, Source: xHamster

    street. I truly wanted to get excited by female dogs. But if they were not on two feet, they didn’t interest me in the least. Instead I found myself always staring at two-legs. Dear me God, if they were partly undressed. At the beach it was all I could do to stay off legs. I had to constantly restrain myself, a hellish kind of punishment. It all goes back to that young summer on the beach, the sheep’s milk and chocolates, Carnie, and my mother’s absence. Again, I tried to like dogs. You should know I tried. I went many times to dog whorehouses, to couple with dogs dressed up as two-legs. That was occasionally satisfactory. And once, in the street in Paris, I met a lovely female dog prostitute walking in high-heels on her hind feet. She was expensive, two milk bones and a biscuit, but I paid it, and up to her doghouse we went. She had dirty claws and seemed distracted, but she was the closest thing yet. Well, these were my formative experiences. The formation of Dogbert Dogbert. If only they had neutered me. All of this might have been averted. [For the sake of brevity I will now skip some of the boring parts.] Desperate to live a normal life, I married an ordinary bitch in Paris. I could tolerate her because she had some human mannerisms. She smirked and liked to wear bandanas around her neck. But soon the charm wore off, she left me for an army bulldog, who came to my house and didn’t flush the toilet. I wanted to kill him, though I was glad to be free at last, if you want ...
    to know the truth. After that, I was busy working on translating the poems of sheep into dog language, but I wasn’t happy and I couldn’t adjust. In fact, I was in the kennel quite a few times, because of tail-between-my-legs. I really hate to admit it. I eventually went to America, where I (and it’s a long story) wound up in a house with a lovely two-leg in it. I tried not to let her own me, but all too soon I was consumed with lust. Oh, eye of my eye, tooth of my tooth. She was always on two legs, hairless, and in a two piece when she sunbathed. I was back on my puppyhood beach. I can’t tell you how great it was sniffing her. She smelled even better than shit. And she seemed to like me, to boot. She let me lick her hand. She let me lick her eyeball, when she had something in it. Wow, that made me pop. I fell for her dog hard. I was constantly wet for that two-leg. Her name was Digita. Oh Digita, my Digita. Woof woof. I wound up socializing extensively with Digita’s dog Hazy, so that I could stay around Digita. I eventually convinced Hazy I was interested. Meanwhile I wrote my perverse memoirs in piss and shit around the house, though I knew I probably shouldn’t. You ought to know that I am a handsome big Gus. A handsome dog is Dogbert, Dogbert. Well, eventually Hazy fell in love and insisted on marrying me, so I became a regular part of the f****y. Oh bliss. And Digita sometimes let me hump her leg when she wasn’t paying attention. Ah God. Never had I known such pleasure. One ...
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