1. Trust


    Date: 7/17/2015, Categories: BDSM, Shemales, Author: klammer, Rating: 100, Source: xHamster

    irritated when I left. All that buildup, and no pay off, except &#034think about it.&#034 Oh, I could have pressed her on it, but I really *was* tired, my emotions were in turmoil, and she looked pretty bedraggled herself. I went to bed rather confused. The problem was that I wanted something nice, something sexy to sl**p in, and didn't have it. So I couldn't feel guilty about it. But I didn't feel guilty even about *thinking* about it, not really. I thought maybe I ought to, and started feeling guilty that I wasn't feeling properly guilty, until I realized what I was doing. Well, that didn't stop me from feeling guilty, but I was so involved in being confused I didn't have much attention to spare for it. Nor did the confusion clear up the next day, when I got up and started to dress, and wistfully wished I hadn't thrown all my multiple- p panties. Which got me to thinking about *why* I stuttered so comprehensively on that word. Why even *thinking* it made me have to walk with my fists in my pockets. I had a very thoughtful evening. The Committee had a wild and woolly conference. Once I started *thinking,* or maybe a better word is *feeling,* a lot of what I thought I knew about myself started getting shaken loose. When I was in college, I used to tell people that I told about my cross-dressing that I only wore underthings, and only silky ones. Because of the *feel* of them. It was, so to speak, merely sex, merely a quirk ('And I can stop any time I really want to'). Sex is ...
    neat, sex is fun, sex brings joy to everyone. Even then, however, I'd had to admit that it wasn't just that. Thing was, I didn't just wear them to jack off. I'd only gotten the guts to wear them under my clothes in public fairly recently. Why did I *want* to, though, if it was just sex? I don't jerk off in public! Well, the whole 'sissy' bit, maybe. I mean, they made me feel nice. Feel, I dunno, pretty. No, that's not it. *Attractive.* That made it palatable. I wanted to be attractive, and that was what I was attracted to. Yes. That was it. I was sure of it. I was *so* attracted to women, that I wanted something of theirs with me all the time. No, wait, that's a different argument, leave that one alone. Right. Just... attractive. I wanna be attractive, and so I dress in a way to attract me. Does that make any sense? Yes! Sure it does! It *has* to be something like that! Just stop thinking about those chapters from Huck Finn, then, the Codger advised me. I didn't have all of this worked out by Friday, though. I dunno, it's a lot harder to work through than to tell. What *did* happen on Friday is that I went shopping. So that when I showed up at Nancy's door, and got my kiss of greeting, she pulled back and exclaimed, &#034You're wearing perfume! Where did you get it?&#034 I grinned, a little excited. &#034I bought it. I think it's more, umm, my style, than the other.&#034 She inhaled again, then frowned. &#034Maybe. Maybe something a little more flowery. Delicate.&#034 I drew ...
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